


Dear Mr. Voice of Your Teeth

by Kittleskittle



Category: Horizon: Zero Dawn (Video Game)
Genre: Crack, Drabble, F/M, Fluff, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-20
Updated: 2020-10-22
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:01:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26002330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kittleskittle/pseuds/Kittleskittle
Summary: Nil is an advice columnist for a Meridian newspaper, and Aloy writes into him...about Nil.A short, cracky drabble originally posted on tumblr, for one of our obnoxious hzd-shipping discord ideas.
Relationships: Aloy/Nil (Horizon: Zero Dawn)
Comments: 15
Kudos: 33





	1. Chapter 1

_Dear Mr. Voice of Your Teeth,_

_There's this man I keep running into on the road. He's very attractive and charming, but he also has some very questionable habits of the murder variety. The people he kills are bad people, don't get me wrong - I just think he enjoys the actual killing part way, _way_ too much. Despite all of this, I'm still intrigued by him. I think about how pretty his eyes are and what kissing him would be like a lot. What should I do?_

_(Your name sounds very familiar, but I can't put my finger on why. Oh well!)_

_-Confused Nora Seeker_

_Dear Confused Nora Seeker,_

_When faced with this kind of conundrum, my advice is simple: embrace your desires. As long as he's of the honorable sort(and he sounds like he is!), why does what he does in his free time matter? A little killing here or there never hurt anyone, after all. Who knows what you're missing out on? Take up that call to arms from your inner desires - the next time you see him, greet him with a kiss, then see where it goes. I have a sneaking suspicion this man may want to kiss you as well. Just a hunch, though! Anyway, go after what you want, when you want it - life's too short to waste on waffling._

_Yours,_

_Mr. Voice of Your Teeth_

_Dear Mr. Voice of Your Teeth,_

_Wow, your advice really worked! Just like you said, I walked up to him and grabbed him, then pulled him in for a kiss. He seemed really caught off guard, but that might have been because he just asked me to duel him to the death. But he kissed me back! Instead of dueling, we participated in other, more enjoyable activities. ;) Thank you so much for your advice!_

_-(no longer)Confused Nora Seeker_

With a content sigh, Aloy placed the Carja feathered quill down and leaned back in her chair. The ink would have to dry, but after that she'd be able to drop her final response off at the drop box for editorials and queries like hers helpfully located directly outside of the headquarters for the Meridian Daily Gazette.

On the bed beside the desk she was occupying, Nil stirred, his eyes cracking open blearily.

"Huntress? Why aren't you in bed?"

Flashing him a pleased grin, Aloy rose from her seat and sauntered to the bedside, skimming a couple of fingers over the markings decorating the roughened curve of his cheek. With a content noise, Nil closed his eyes and snuggled back into the pillow.

"I just wanted to finish my letter to Mr. Voice of Your Teeth. You know, that advice column personality. He's the reason any of this happened at all."

Her lover's eyes shot open, and he sat up so quickly he nearly smashed his face into Aloy's on the way up. She reared back with a startled yelp.

"Woah, watch it! Nil, what's wrong?"

A flush had settled over the pale span of his face. "Oh, uh, nothing. Just...just a spasm. " He cleared his throat. "Now that you're done, why don't you come back to bed with me? It's really late, and you should be resting."

Aloy's eyes narrowed while she looked him over. In her suspicion, a thought occurred to her - one she hadn't considered before, but really should have. "Wait a minute. Mr. Voice of Your Teeth...your bow...your bow's name is Voice of _Our_ Teeth...blessed _All-Mother_. I'm so stupid. _Fuck_."  
A sheepish grin split Nil's lips. "Well, you caught me, little huntress. I pen an advice column in my free time."

"Did you know it was me?" Aloy asked flatly.

Nil shifted with a grimace, and he rubbed at the back of his head. "There aren't many Nora Seekers who have run into men with hobbies of a more...visceral nature."

"You told me to _kiss you_!" she shrieked. Before he had a second to react, she lunged at him. Her fingers wrapped around his wrists, and she pinned him to the bed. Even in the low light, Aloy could make out the way Nil's pupils dilated, eclipsing the silver of his iris almost entirely.

"Yes, yes," he replied lowly, his gaze sweeping appreciatively over the curves and angles of her body. "But really, can you find it in yourself to be that upset with me? If I hadn't told you to, we'd have missed all this."

Twisting one of his hands out of her grip, Nil grabbed her arm and pulled her down for a scorching kiss that left her breathless and more than a little eager for more, much to her chagrin.

"Come to bed." The heat in his voice was enough to set the coals simmering in her gut aflame, and Aloy shivered.

"Fine." With the last of her rapidly fading self-control, she fixed him with a stern glare. "But we're talking about this later, Mr. Voice of Your Teeth."

"Later, Confused Nora Seeker," he murmured, bringing her in for another kiss.


	2. Love Letters

Aloy was sitting in the basement of Olin's old apartment - now hers - concentrating on repairing some damage to one of her bows when the world around her exploded into a flurry of white.

Reflexively, she sprang to her feet, bow at the ready. Her brow furrowed in the next second as she realized what the debris were: parchment paper. 

"They're all about you."

The sudden sound of Nil's voice behind her had her jerking around like an alerted machine. Aloy's eyes creased with irritation.

"What are you talking about, and why does it involve dumping paper all over me?"

Her lover tilted his head towards the pile of parchment on the ground with a cocked eyebrow. "They're letters to Mr. Voice of Your Teeth. And in every last one of them, the writer whines about being in love with you."

Aloy scowled at him. "Haha, very funny, Nil."

"I'm serious. It's interfering with my ability to write my column."

"Whatever." Rolling her eyes, Aloy turned back to her work bench. "This wasn't even one of your better jokes." 

There was a shuffling, then Nil cleared his throat and began, "Dear Mr. Voice of Your Teeth, I met the most exquisite woman recently. Her beauty shines more radiantly than the sun itself, matched only by the ferocity of her spirit. I am a man of high station, although such things do not matter to her - "

"That could be referring to anyone," Aloy said flatly, her back still turned to him.

"Patience. I'll get to it. Ahem - 'She is a woman of high regard - a Nora Seeker. I confess that she has already rejected my advances once before due to an entanglement interfering with her own goals, but she left room for the possibility in the future. What should my path forward be? Is it wise to pursue her now? Should I move on? May the Sun light your way, Radiantly Restless'. "

"Okay, I'll give you that that one's about me," Aloy conceded, bending over her bow with a frown. 

"Obviously. And then there's this one: 'Hey, Mr. Voice of Your Teeth. I got this Nora girl I'm sweet on. She's as strong as steel, has hair as red as the flames in a forge. Never met anyone like her, except for maybe my sister. She's pretty immune to my flirting, but honestly, I'm not sure if she even knows I'm flirting with her. Should I be more obvious? Do you think she's interested? Should I just come out and say, hey, I like you. In a romantic way. Want to grab an ale and see where this goes? Thanks in advance, Lonesome Spark'."

Twisting around on her chair, she glared at Nil.

"That one's pushing it."

"Oh, really? How many other red-headed Nora have you come across?" he countered.

"Several!" Aloy exclaimed. He gave her a skeptical look. "Okay, it was more like...reddish-brown hair, but still!"

"Uh huh. And how should I reply to all of these suitors?"

"Tell them I'm very obviously not interested," she said primly. A strange expression had settled over her lover's face, and realization hit her all at once. Aloy's eyes widened. "Wait, are you _jealous?_ "

"Of course not," Nil grumbled, a little too sourly to be convincing.

She let out a disbelieving laugh. "All-Mother, you _are_. You're actually jealous!"

It became even more obvious when his face smoothed over, his expression carefully blank other than his usual slight smirk. 

"I know who you go to bed with at the end of the night," he said breezily. "It doesn't bother me that others might pine after what they can't have."

Aloy raised an eyebrow. "And what if I wanted to go to bed with someone else?"

"I would appreciate it if you brought me along for the fun," Nil muttered, but his face fell, just slightly. "But - you're your own woman, Aloy. I don't own you. If there are others you wish to bed, I won't stop you. There are certainly many who are more...worthy of you."

"Stop that," she snapped, rising to her feet. Her arms looped around his waist, and she pulled him close, tilting her chin up defiantly. "You're more than worthy of me, Nil. And you're the only one I want, the only one I've _ever_ wanted."

"I'm a disgraced former soldier who went to prison for two years for war crimes," he deadpanned. "That's not exactly on par with the Sun-King himself."

At Aloy's stunned look, a little bit of his lopsided grin reappeared. 

"Oh, yes, I know about the flame Avad carries for you. In fact, I'm fairly certain the entirety of the Sundom does at this point. Guards gossip as much as kitchen maids, and his Radiance isn't exactly subtle."

"All-Mother," Aloy moaned, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Well, that's embarassing."

That grin grew larger. "Of course, if you'd like to go to bed with both him and I, I certainly wouldn't be opposed - "

"Nil, shut up."

"As you wish, huntress," he replied with a shrug.

She tightened her arms around him and rested her head on his chest so that he couldn't see her face. "Either way, you should know that I only want you. Not a Sun-King, not someone more 'worthy' - whatever that means. _You_." Aloy hesitated. "Look, I'm not good at making big, meaningful speeches, but you're my hunting partner. You don't hold me back, you go everywhere with me, even to ruins and the deepest reaches of the wilds. I can trust that you've always got my back. You make me laugh, and you take care of me, even when I'm too stubborn to slow down. I'm...I'm actually happy with you, okay? That's really hard for me to admit, so stop saying you're not good enough for me. I think you are, and that's all that should matter."

The air was silent and still for several long heartbeats, and then Nil's hands came to rest on Aloy's shoulders. He pushed her back slightly, urging her to look up at him by sliding a couple of fingers under her chin.

Bending forward, he whispered, "I love you too," then closed the gap between them to kiss her so sweetly that her heart ached from how full it was.

The pile of letters lay forgotten on the floor as they made their way upstairs to the bedroom, hand in hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspiration struck, so I wrote more for this! Started out cracky, got fluffy...because it's me. Sigh.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on [Tumblr!](http://kittleskittle.tumblr.com/)
> 
> If you'd like to join in on the hzd-shipping discord shenanigans AND are over 18, here's the [invite link!](https://discord.gg/nCHaZPJ)


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